"Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." - Elizabeth Stone

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Maybe he does 'get it' after all....

He's at the age where he wants everything.
All for himself.
Doesn't want to share.
Doesn't want to give.
Anything.
Ever.

This "phase" is pretty frustrating.
As parents, you don't want your child to be 'that child'.
Because, chances are, you've encountered a few
adults that you know were 'that child'.

Most of us probably don't give to and do for others
as much as we can or should.
I'm guilty there.
But we at least want to teach our kids to be kind
to others.
I guess the giving will follow.
 

We took cookies to all three Clinton Fire Stations
and the Police Station
on Thanksgiving Day.
I explained why -
that we always want to thank those that keep us safe.
That it's not always about us
and the things that we have/get/want.
That it feels good when you give to others
without getting or expecting anything in return.

We try to keep the explanations simple.

We talk about the "red bucket" and "charities" when
we go to Wal-Mart or Kroger.
(I always make sure to have change in my pocket.)

We try to teach him that this is how God wants us to be.
That He wants us to give.
He wants us to be kind.

The understanding usually only lasts so long.
Then he sees something on tv or in the store that
he wants/"needs".
He snatches and won't share with his sister/cousins/friends.
He gets angry when I suggest that he gather some
old toys to give to kids that don't have any -
he's afraid "they'll want all his toys" if he gives
just the old ones.

We start thinking we've failed.
That he doesn't really 'get it'.
We know he has a kind heart -
and we want to him to show it.

Then he does.
He shows us that his heart is bigger than you would
expect from someone his age.

 

Jake loves our mailman.
He can hear his truck turn onto the street behind us.
If he's not already in the garage waiting,
he stops what he's doing to go greet him at the mailbox.
Today, he wanted to sit in a chair on the sidewalk
to wait.
I gave him a candy cane ball (peppermint)
while he waited.
He said he needed two.
(Ugh! There he goes being greedy again.)
I told him he could have another one when he came back inside.
He then told me he was only going to eat one.
He wanted to give the other one to Mr. Mitch
(yes, they're on a first name basis) -
"jus to say thanks for bringing our mail".
(Ugh! And there he goes proving us wrong again.)

May not sound like a big deal to most.
He didn't give up any of his toys.
He didn't help put food on someone's table or
clothes on someone's back.

It was just candy.

But that's not the point.
He gave.
Something that was his -
that he wasn't asked to give.
To someone else.
And didn't expect anything in return.

Maybe he does 'get it' after all....
 
 

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